Friday, October 29, 2010

School dances: pros and cons

Last night, there was a Halloween dance at my school. I don't know why it was on a Thursday instead of a Friday, but I've stopped asking questions at this point. So instead of ranting about how it went, I'm going to list the pros and cons of school dances in general.

Pro: Get up to date on popular music

I stopped listening to the radio after *shudder* Justin Beiber, because that was the day I lost all faith in pop music. Not that I had much to begin with. This being the case, I don't know a lot of the popular songs right now. So I did get to hear lots of songs...that I now kinda wished I hadn't. Which brings me to:

Con: All of it sucks

It all started sounding the same after a few minutes. To be honest, I think that the music itself is usually good-catchy beats, good for dancing to...except for some awkward moments in songs where it suddenly gets quiet and slow, and everyone just has to stand around looking like an idiot until it goes back.

...But anyway, it's not generally the music I have a problem with. It's the god-awful lyrics. One example: Ke$ha's hit "Tik Tok." I'm not even going near that std-infested wasteland.

Pro: Dress in costumes (if it's a Halloween dance)

Having an over the top costume is a heck-load of fun, and Halloween is the one day you can get away with it, except maybe at DragonCon. If you do it on any other day, you will get some weird looks. Please don't ask how I know this.

Con: "Slut" is not a costume

....Except maybe if you're dressing as Snooki?

Anyway, I'm not saying that you shouldn't look sexy. Just have some class, please?

If you must dress like that, at least make it original. I counted about 30 playboy bunnies, 19 cowgirls, 3 maids, and 5 firefighters. What I'd really like to see is a sexy Elmo.

Oh, wait. Forgot about this.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Adventures in babysitting

Last night, I babysat.Why the parents trusted me with their children, I will never know.

First, they had a new and extremely cute dog. Maple was just a puppy, so she didn't know that when she bites people it hurts. A lot. She also had yet to figure out that people putting her outside was a punishment.

After I made some pizza, the kids and I made some homemade ice cream from a recipe I found on the internet.

And that's why I don't trust the internet.

But overall, we had a good time, and they payed me well. What's most amazing is that even though they seem quite sane, they actually want me to babysit again.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Updating regularly

I now have a record of 3 viewers. Not that I am bragging.

I have mixed feelings about regular updates. On one hand, it makes me seem more organized and on top of things, even though I am obviously not. On the other hand, I feel like I would freak out from the pressure of having to think of something funny/interesting on a regular basis, instead of having random bursts of either genius or insanity. Or pms.

So, 3 readers that I actually know personally and pressured into reading this, what do you think? Comment, or I will be sad.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

I am spamming you all

Because I want more readers. So whoever may be reading this, which is probably 1 person total, spread the word around!

....And yes, you hate me now. As a combination of an apology for spamming, a gift for spreading the word around, and having too much sugar today, here's a shark that shoots lasers.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Three levels of Fandom

1: Light Fan

This person is as close to normal as a fan can get. They like the book/movie/actor, but it doesn't take over their whole lives. You can have a pleasant conversation with them, and they don't try to force their fandom down your throat.

2: Medium Fan

There are 2 ways this could go-they could talk about the thing they like a lot, but still retain some concept of normal conversation, or they could be outwardly normal, pretending they don't like it, then go home and write NC-17 fan fiction until the wee hours of the night.

3: Hardcore Fan

The people you rarely see, because they are watching/reading/fapping to their obsession 23 hours per day. When you talk to them, they speak of nothing but that and how awesome it is, and you are afraid to disagree because they will probably claw your eyes out.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Dentists, Pms, and why I now hate orange Kool-aid

It pretty much started a week ago, when my orthodontist said I needed braces because I had an overbite and my teeth didn't fit together properly.
Before that, I had always thought my teeth were fine, and no one had ever said they were weird before, until that guy did.

He made my teeth all sad.

Fortunately, I did not kill him. Unfortunately, a week later it was "my time of the month," so I was a little unstable about anything involving teeth.

I got spacers put in my back teeth, which are basically little blue rubber bands that they stick in between your teeth so you can't close your mouth properly. I let them do this without protest, because I was entranced by the dentist chair.

You know the ones. They are big and squishy and comfy, and dentists can magically make them go up and down and they have all those shiny buttons on the sides that you're not allowed to touch but god dammit you really want to because they look fun.

So I got the spacers put in, which took about 30 seconds, went home, and went to bed.

I had only gotten a few hours of sleep, I had severe pms, and now I couldn't eat anything all day, except a ton of orange Kool-Aid, which tasted like an angry cat but seemed to be the only thing I could drink.

Later that day, I drew this:
It was brought on by either my horrible pms, lack of sleep, or maybe the Kool-Aid was spiked. Probably all 3.

So I can't drink orange Kool-Aid any more, not that I liked it much anyway. On the plus side, I do know what I want for christmas. I'm getting one of those dentist chairs.